Christmas Day was one of the toughest days I've had in several years. Like many families, our family is a blended family. Not only was my husband thousands of miles away but all three of our children were spending the majority of the day with their other "half". I found myself feeling completely lost - as though my entire purpose in life somehow did not exist. How was this possible? Spending Christmas Day alone...are you kidding me? The title track "Woe is Me" of my newly released CD called "Feel Sorry for Sherry" was playing through the surround sound in my head. This CD is a complete waste of money - don't buy it. I spent Christmas day in bed...semi-awake in between Hallmark Christmas movies... I am pretty sure I watched every "Mrs. Miracle" movie ever made. At one point I remember waking up in the middle of my oldest son's all-time favorite holiday movie "Santa Clause" only to be reminded of my feelings of abandonment. We were scheduled to meet back up at 6:00 that evening to head to my mother-in-law's house to celebrate with my husband's family. When my alarm went off at 4:30 that afternoon it took every ounce of energy to get into the shower (pathetic I know)... I finally made it... and at 6:00 that night I was reunited with my children and we were on our way to Portland.
How can we jump from being ecstatic to feeling lost in virtually the same moment. I am blessed beyond measure. And, I have to get rid of my self titled CD immediately. We were able to share bits and pieces of the holiday weekend with my husband via Skype.... we carefully placed the netbook on the coffee table and huddled around it while we opened Christmas presents. And, we even took a picture with my husband smack dab in the middle of it all. Who cares if the picture is of him on the laptop with us surrounding him. What matters is that we were able to share those moments. We shared laughter, love and tears..together - as a family.
There were several special moments over the Christmas holiday: playing Family Feud to win our Christmas presents at my father-in-laws home and the amazing meal they served; Christmas mass silently remembering the previous five Christmas services with my husband; watching my nephew, Gabe, as he waited patiently for his turn to open presents; opening my new carpet cleaner (I really do love those kinds of presents); listening to Taylor joke around with Uncle Bob, Uncle Brian and Papa Mark; watching my niece Tori as she tried so hard to get her cousin (Gabe) to pay attention to her; listening to my husband as he said "what are you wearing" as Tiffany flashed across the computer screen (as she responded "parenting via Skype"); looking at the scrapbook my sister-in-law made us full of pictures of my husband with all of us and simply just spending time with our family. While nothing will take the place of my husband being home for the holidays....or getting to see my side of the family....I am blessed with my husband's family and so much more.
It is not always easy to stay positive and uplifting. As a military spouse I believe it is my duty to do everything in my power to look at the glass as half full. It is my duty to help lift the spirits of other military wives and family members. It is my duty to be a role model to my children. IT IS MY DUTY!
As a side note (can't help that I am always thinking about a million things at once) I've noticed that some of the social medias sites that military families lean on for support and encouragement are often times just the opposite. They are filled with rumors, name-calling, and hostility at times. We ALL have a DUTY to one another...a duty to support one another and to lift each other up. As the New Year is fast approaching please take a moment to reflect on your duty...are you serving as an example to other military families? To your children? I am very proud of my husband...beyond what words could ever convey. I want my husband to be just as proud of me and the work that I am doing back home. And, I want to be proud of myself. It is my duty.
Much love,
Household Six
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